Friday Funnies: Exercise

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Exercise

Friday Funnies: Grain of Salt

I always take life with a grain of salt, …plus a slice of lemon, …and a shot of tequila.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Grain of Salt

Friday Funnies: Wet Paint

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Wet Paint

Friday Funnies: Best Friend

You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket… I’d miss you heaps and think of you often.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Best Friend

Friday Funnies: Hospitality

Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Hospitality

Friday Funnies: In Trouble

The sole purpose of a child’s middle name, is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: In Trouble

Friday Funnies: That Moment

Nothing stinks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: That Moment

Friday Funnies: Good Evening

Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Good Evening

Friday Funnies: Second Mouse

The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Second Mouse

Friday Funnies: Agree With You

If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Agree With You

Friday Funnies: A Better Tomorrow

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: A Better Tomorrow

Friday Funnies: Children

Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 telling them to sit down and shut-up.

~Unknown

Friday Funnies: Children